The Other Side
by countess81
Summary: How "Skin and Bones" *should* have ended... Pure Dreamgirl fluff. Take a bite ;)


Title: The Other Side (1/1)   
Author: Meredith (roswelldreamer@aol.com)   
Category: M/L   
Rating: PG-13   
Disclaimer: I don't own Max, or Liz, or Roswell. Boo for me.   
Summary: Liz tells her story of the post-destiny summer.**Pure Dreamgirl fluff.**   
Author's Note: Liz POV. Let's just pretend the premiere episode ends with the   
M/L memory scene in front of the Crashdown.   
Dedication: to my new friends in the VGs, y'all rock. And of course, To Teri   
Leigh, Stacy, and Steph who read my fic even if it's crap.   
Inspiration: Jason and Shiri and their general delightfulness. And also "Brave   
New World" by Richard Ashcroft (the song played in the scene).   
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_"Into the brave new world_   
_I hope I see you on the other side of this changing world_   
_Baby, when my ship pulls in_   
_I try to believe in anyone_   
_Look at the state I'm in_   
_But for now I'm just sitting at the table_   
_Singing songs, wishing I was able, stable."_   


* * *

Every morning in Florida began exactly the same.

My Aunt Leigh would wake me up at dawn to go running with her, and I   
would happily oblige. I'd do anything to save me from the nightmares I would   
have about everything going on at home. One particularly disturbing one   
involved Max being killed by a creature with three eyes and six long tentacles.

After the run, I would come back and shower then sit out by the pool in   
her backyard and write in my journal. Most of the entries started out like this:

_"It's such-and-such-day, I'm Liz Parker… and I've gone 'x' minutes without thinking about calling Max."_   
  
I thought that everyday would be the day I'd finally call Max, and we'd   
talk and everything would be okay. He'd tell me that the whole destiny thing   
was fake… that Tess made it all up just to get him to be with her… that none of   
it was true, that there were no evil aliens after them and for me to come home so   
we could be together again.

That phone call never happened, except maybe every once in a while in my   
dreams.

Mostly I just wondered exactly what moment my life turned into a science   
fiction movie. I guess it was the moment Max connected with me to save me, and   
our souls were melded forever.

My heart will always ache for Max. My brain tells me otherwise. This   
entire summer was a civil war in my body between my heart and my brain.

And my aunt wondered why I was always so sick. My heart was trying to   
rebel against the rest of my body. It was practically screaming at me to call Max,   
to apologize and to ask for his forgiveness.

I don't know why I never tried to contact him. My head was telling me it   
was for the best- telling me that Max was going to be with Tess now, and that's   
the way it was supposed to happen. But my heart told me that Max would never   
give up on me, on us.

I admired his strength. I still do.

Seeing him for the first time in months was… painful to say the least. I   
admit that I was cold: it's a defense mechanism I developed in our time apart. I   
shut myself down, kind of like Michael. Maria would tell me how he used to call   
himself "a stonewall." He couldn't let anyone in.

Well I couldn't let Max in. I couldn't be hurt again. I knew it wasn't his   
fault, it wasn't anyone's fault, but I was looking to blame someone. So I cut   
myself off from everyone, even Maria and Alex. I'm surprised they're still   
talking to me. Thank God for small miracles.

He couldn't let me go. He couldn't give up on us as easily as I did.   
Strength. One of the million things I love about him. I could get a journal with   
five hundred pages and I still wouldn't have enough room to write down   
everything I love about Max Evans.

And you wonder why we still weren't together…

A few days after I came home, Max and the others had their first big   
crisis: Michael was arrested for murdering Pierce and they had to break into Las   
Cruces University to retrieve his bones.

I know, I won't go into it. Too technical.

The night Michael was freed was the night things changed for us. Max   
cornered me as I was trying to go home. He touched my arm and I got a rush of   
images from the night we almost made love. I hadn't thought about that night   
all summer, and now I could feel the desire coursing through my veins.

For the first time in four months, I felt alive.

He felt it too.

Then he kissed me. The heat started in my lips and crushed through the   
stone surrounding my heart.

I tried to fight it, really I did.

But before I knew it, I was in his arms again, my body melting into his.   
He had to hold me to keep me from falling over.

How could I have ever let him go?

My pulse quickened as he broke free of my lips and moved down to my   
neck, brushing his soft lips past my ear and whispering the three words I had   
tried to forget the whole summer:

_"I love you."_

My first thought was that my ears were deceiving me. How could he still   
possibly love me after everything we'd been through? His lips were back on mine,   
his body pressed tightly against me, his hands in my hair, his eyelashes dancing   
on my face, telling me without words that everything would be all right as long   
as we were together.

How could I have forgotten?

His voice was husky, deeper than I remember… had he changed as much   
as I had this summer?

_"I need you."_ He whispered into my hair.

I'm floating. His hands are on my waist, guiding me into the Crashdown.   
I tried to turn around, pleaded with him to stop, to leave, to go home. He   
wouldn't. My heart screamed for him to stay as my head screamed for him to go.   
Max always listened to my heart. Another one of the reasons I love him. He   
knows my heart better than I do.

I try to stifle a squeal as we walk through the floor of the restaurant. I   
didn't know that everyone was still there. My first thought was Maria. I could   
feel her eyes burning holes in my head. I wanted to go over and hug her, tell her   
to forget about Michael and all the pain he caused her, but how hypocritical   
would that be?

I am not a hypocrite. As Max guided my body through the doors and up   
the back stairs, the place was dead silent. I can still see Tess's mouth hanging   
open like she was trying to catch flies.

I feel like such a hypocrite. I leave Max, then I'm gone all summer   
without so much as a word to Maria or Alex, my two best friends in the world.   
Then I'm not back 48 hours and Max and I are together again? I sound like such a   
hypocrite.

But they will have to wait. Max has other plans, and he isn't taking a   
raincheck.

"Max, we have to stop." The first thing I'd said to him that night. He sat   
down on the couch as I stood in front of him, his gorgeous brown eyes looking   
up at me with such longing that my knees began to shake. He put his hands on   
either side of my hips and pulled me down into his lap. "Max…" I moaned his   
name in warning. I knew it wasn't going to do any good. I knew what he was   
going to say next. It's easy to know what the other half of your heart, soul, and   
mind was thinking.

"Stop it, okay. Stop fighting this…stop fighting me. Tell me that you   
don't love me anymore and I'll leave right now. We can go back to being just   
friends, the way it used to be." Max said firmly, his voice heavy with emotion.

Of course I still love you, Max. It's so easy for me to feel, so hard for me   
to say.

_"I can't… I can't say it."_

I felt warm fingers travel up my back and across my neck and down my   
shoulders, followed by warm lips. His lips moved from my shoulders back up to   
my throat and I searched blindly for his other hand, which was resting on my   
knee. As I brought his other hand up to my face, I kissed his open palm and slid   
out of his lap and back on my feet.

"Max." I said quietly, firmly.

"Liz. I'm not trying to pressure you." He said softly like a frightened   
child.

I paused, choosing my next statement carefully. "Max, I just need time. I   
need time to think." I held my breath, waiting for the tears to fall, knowing they   
would come...

"I've thought of nothing but you this entire summer." He said, looking   
down at his feet so I couldn't see that he was crying. I didn't realize he was until   
I saw a fat, warm teardrop fall onto the top of his shoe and roll onto the floor.

I gasped, my eyes blazing. "See, Max, that's what I'm talking about! I   
can't stand in the way of what you have to do…" I couldn't stand it anymore. He   
couldn't say those things to me... he was making it so hard... so hard to walk   
away from him.

_"But it means nothing without you." _He said strongly, voice unwavering.

My heart sunk to my stomach. My left hand went to my abdomen as I   
crouched over in shock, longing, love, pain... it all was coming together for me.   
Right at that very moment.

He looked at me, the tears shimmering in his eyes, his voice heavy with   
emotion. He noticed that I was crying now too and he reached out and grabbed   
my free hand, pressing it to his cheek.

"Liz, please don't cry..." He pleaded with me. "It doesn't have to be like   
this. We can be happy again. We can be together, the way it's *supposed* to be."   
He fell to his knees and buried his face in my stomach.

I sighed, the last pieces of the wall around my heart crumbling down   
mercilessly. I kneeled down slowly as his face brushed up against my stomach,   
my breasts, my neck, and finally my lips.

"I don't want to fight anymore..." I whispered into his mouth as his lips   
brushed mine gently, gaining urgency with every breath. It was useless to deny   
what was happening to me... to us. I could feel my soul warm up with every kiss.   
This is where I belong. I know that now.

_ I am home. I will never leave again._   


~End~   



End file.
